day 30: we did it!

30 minutes - going with the flow

i book-ended my practice yesterday and today. literally less than 7 hours between them and most of that time was spent sleeping.

i started with sun salutations today and then just did more of what i felt like doing. i figured as my reward for 30 days of practice in a row, i could just do what felt good. the backs of my legs were really tight so i did a lot of forward bends, both standing and sitting. i tried to do a standing balance, but kept tipping over so i stopped. in the sun salutations, i managed to hover over the floor instead of plopping my belly down for each series this morning. usually i get tired and give myself a break, but not today.

i cannot believe we were able to find time to practice for 30 days in a row. i feel so accomplished and also like i shifted my mind to look forward to practicing. i'm going to continue  but i'm also going to give myself a break if i need rest more than motion.

my secondary goal of getting my heels down in downward dog was not met, but as i'm going to continue to practice, i'm going to keep it as a goal.

congratulations to my good friend who i couldn't have done it without. even from half-way around the world, having that support and accountability kept me going.

day 29: at the end of the day

20 minutes - nice and easy

i didn't get out of bed this morning to practice. which means that i went through my day understanding that i needed to find time this evening for myself.

well, 1 trip to the shoe store, 1 trip to the grocery store, 4 dozen iced cupcakes, 1 baked birthday cake and 2 glasses of wine later i found time to practice. i consciously decided to wait until after all of my evening activities were completed otherwise i wouldn't be able to focus on my breath and my body and the whole practice would be wasted.

tonight, i made up my own little evening practice. i held each pose for 10 breaths which allowed me to actually focus in on myself instead of getting distracted by the things to be done tomorrow. i also managed the full lotus position tonight. believe it.

now, however, i'm ready for bed. to end this 30 day challenge, i'm apparently going to bookend my practices.

day 28: trying to get taller

25 minutes - balance and alignment

the balance class i took at work stuck with me and this morning i tried to recreate that feeling of getting taller and creating space in my middle. i'm not sure i quite managed that in my 25 minute practice, but i feel longer. (at least a little)

i should have thought this one through a little more rather than trying to rely on my memory early in the monring. but, here we are.

today is the 4 consecutive week of practicing every day. i am super proud of my good friend who joined me on this. and i'm super impressed with myself that i've developed enough discipline and motivation to get up early just about everyday to make time for something that's important to me.

the article i read in the beginning talked about creating a habit. i hope i've created a good one.

ashtanga and the ego

i just read a blog post called ashtanga yoga - the mighty ego crusher which rings fairly true to me. as a young person, i learned ashtanga at the gym. i totally thought it was just gym yoga, but the advantage for me was two fold. first, the teacher was excellent and really took time to break down the poses and offer encouragement and adjustment to meet my ability and fear. second, the class sizes were generally quite small and sometimes i was the only person practicing. i got tons of individual attention.

through the year, i've practiced off and on, but never realized how much i had learned in my first introduction to yoga. last year, i took a formally led ashtanga class at a studio. the other participants were tiny, fit and young. i felt old and out of practice. the teacher was a man who literally wore a tank top and what appeared to be boxer briefs. being a little softer in the middle, i felt completely out of place.

i got adjusted. i got called out. i got thoroughly exhausted. but for me, it still felt like home. since i've started this 30 day yoga challenge, i have not yet done the full primary series. i feel like i'm not ready to dive in and take that feeling of not-good-enough.

after reading this post, thought, i feel much more willing to give it a try. and i'll still get exhausted. and i'll still get adjusted, but i won't let it get me down.

day 27: had a plan, modified my plan

25 minutes - self-guided practice

this morning, i had a plan for how i wanted to move through my practice and i just kept modifying based on how i felt. i did more full vinyasas than i usually do, but i felt strong so i kept going. i added warrior 3 and the full side-angle pose instead of the modified version. i learned the fire log pose at the class on sunday and included that in my practice. it felt like a choose your own adventure book only it was actually my adventure.

last night, while talking with M, he asked me fairly incredulously if i seriously couldn't get my heels to the ground in downward-dog. nope. still can't. well, apparently he can. obviously, i asked for a demonstration. at first, his form was not so good, but after we adjusted, he could still touch both heels to the ground.

i think it's the male body. the only other people i know who regularly practice are women. maybe we're just physically built differently. i feel like he's beating me and not even trying! i know in my head that practicing yoga is not a competition, but it can still feel like that sometimes.

my new goal is to get my heels to the ground by day 30. which leaves me 3 more days. we'll see...

day 26: sivananda

20 minutes - modified sivananda

the sivananda series starts with headstand which as i mentioned the first time i tried this series, i cannot do right now. i tried dolphin instead which is hard, but manageable. my intention was to breathe 10 breaths in each poses. i did 10 breaths, but i had to take a break in the middle of a few- specifically, dolphin, boat and up-ward facing dog. i am building strength, but i'm not there yet.

i've been thinking about continuing my practice after the 30 consecutive days, but giving myself some free passes for mornings like this morning. i hit the snooze button 3 times and i don't even remember falling back asleep in between. suddenly it was just ringing again.

and i may have been a little out of it getting started. i realized after i finished my practice the i wore my shirt inside out the whole time. yeah, that happened.

day 25: yoga at the studio

90 minutes - vinyasa 1/2

i went to my first studio class since i started the 30 day yoga challenge. i used my pass to balanced yoga and attended the 8:30am class. when i signed up for the early class it seemed like a great idea. at about 10pm last night, it seemed less good. nonetheless, i got up, put on my big girl (yoga) pants and headed out.

the regular instructor is apparently out recovery from a surgery, but i still really liked the person who subbed for her. it felt good to practice with a group and still maintain a focus on my body and my breath. i felt tall and strong and open when we finished.

since i've been practicing at home for so long, i asked the instructor after class if she noticed anything i should be aware of or if my form was good. she said i looked good and wasn't noticeably doing anything to hurt myself. she said she thought my practice was good.

it feels good to have validation not only that i'm doing it right, but that i can hang with a group that meets regularly for 90 minutes and still be able to keep going.

day 24: on the floor

20 minutes - legs and hips

M left before i woke up to go run the cap city half marathon today. i figured he'd be toast for most of the afternoon and rather than miss practicing today, i also got up bright and early. i made it exactly 20 minutes before V started calling for me.

i'm planning to attend a 90 minute class tomorrow and i really wanted a light practice to start the day. i used a strap and did seated forward bends, pigeon pose and some twists. i felt good and moved easily.

and then we started our days.

day 23: standing, balancing, seated

25 minutes - same as yesterday (almost)

this morning, i chose the same pattern as yesterday, but as i went through the poses i made adjustments and changes along the way. for some reason, the full up-dog position hurts the inside of my right wrist. i modified to cobra, but i miss the satisfaction of rolling over my toes into down-dog.

the back of my legs felt tight today so i added two forward bends at the beginning to loosen myself up a bit. i did the first two bends from the primary series. as i pulled up on my toes and pushed down through my legs, i opened my shoulders, too.

but, then M walked downstairs and stepped around me. then the cat decided she wanted to be on my mat, too. i kept thinking about all the stuff i had to do today. not as focused as i would have preferred to be.

it happens.

day 22: self-guided practice

25 minutes

last night before bed, i grabbed my yoga deck and pulled out 6 or 8 poses that seemed to flow in my mind. this morning, i rolled out of bed, rolled out my mat and lined up my cards so i wouldn't forget.

i started with some sun salutations and then moved through the poses. as i got into my practice, i rearranged and added variations as i felt like it. adjusting as i practiced made sense.i added happy baby after my shoulder stand and plow because my back felt tight.  i could move how i wanted to move and not feel like i have to go with the rest of the group.

the risk in self-guided practice is that i'll never do the poses i find uncomfortable or scary. i'm hopeful that attending a group class (in person) once a week will help me continue to grow in my practice.

also, today a woman told me that i walk like a model. she said that i walked with grace like the models walk. "did you take modelling classes as a girl?" nope. i am not a model and couldn't really ever be mistaken for one. but i believe that my yoga practice over the last 3 weeks has made a noticeable difference in how i carry myself.

who wouldn't want to walk with grace?

day 21: on my own

30-35 minutes - sivananda

i followed the advice of my good friend and tried the 12 basic asanas in the sivananda practice. to be truthful, i can't really do a headstand at the moment so i skipped that one. i focused on my breath and started with 5 series A sun salutations and 3 B then cycled through the poses.

i couldn't figure out how to prop my hips in fish pose, but here we are. i liked being able to follow my own breath and i held most of the poses for 10 breaths each. when i hold a pose that long i find that about half way through i relax or realize i can shift deeper or move my body to refocus and finish up.

without the verbal guidance, i felt able to focus in on myself in a different way. i'm going to keep trying a quieter practice.

day 20: sun salutations

30 minutes - sun salutations and so on

from yoga journal

i feel like a kid who left her homework at school. i woke up this morning without a plan for my practice and ended up choosing a class focused on repetition. really, the class had participants do 10 series A sun salutations and then i did the first of 10 series B sun salutations before i turned off the class and did my own thing.

rather than continue to be annoyed with the class, i chose to follow what my body wanted to do. i did some forward bends, a standing balancing pose, cobbler's pose, a twist and happy baby. it felt really good to practice on my own without someone chatting at me. while i certainly didn't look like the model in the picture, i got a good stretch.

tonight, i'm actually going to do my homework and make a plan for myself for tomorrow morning. then, when i start going to the studio once a week (thanks to my amazing birthday present!), it will be a welcome feeling to be guided through a practice.

day 19: condensed full practice

30 minutes - quick essential poses

this morning, i feel like we took a full practice and crammed it into 30 minutes. we started with 3 sun salutations, did a couple standing poses (warrior 2 and triangle), balanced in mountain, transitioned into seated poses and ended in hero.

for me, i would have chosen a different series of poses, but the flow made sense. i just didn't care for the seated poses we did. apparently so much so that i can't remember what they were. meh.

maybe instead of doing an online class, i'll take some time this evening to design my own practice. i bet i can come up with a series that takes 30 minutes, follows a similar pattern and takes the path i want to take.

maybe that will be my challenge within my challenge. do you have any tips for planning a practice?

day 18: a gentle practice

20 minutes - nice and easy

today is my birthday and rather than wake up at 6am for yoga, i decided to sleep in a bit. i also kicked my own butt a bit with yesterday's practice and my arms could certainly feel the workout. i did a nice gentle practice, mostly on the floor, and stretched out my hips, my hamstrings and my back. just right.

i also had a massage today and it turns out my giant knot was actually on my right side, not my left like i thought. my right upper body was so knotted up and tight that i overstretched my left side which is what caused the pain. the good part is that my knots are gone. the bad part is that i'm a little sore from how hard she had to push to get my muscles to ease up.

tired, sore, but glad to be sorted out.

day 17: modified primary series

60 minutes - ashtanga modified primary

my practice today is the best one yet. i had a whole hour (M took the girls to the grocery) and i figured after more than 2 weeks of daily practice my body would be ready for a proper class. i've been telling myself to stick with beginner classes and level 1 ability because i've been away for so long.

today felt like coming home. i knew the pattern and my body remembers the poses. i didn't have to watch the instructor, i could finally just follow my breath and move through.

she did about half of the primary series, but in an hour it was still a serious practice. i feel strong and i feel tired. i forgot how much one goes from a seated pose back through plank, updog and downdog. today is the first time i've been able to *almost* jump through.

i wish i could do a practice like this more often, but finding an hour is challenging. however, tomorrow is my birthday and i feel like this gives me license to ask for a little extra time.

this is also the first time i've felt really calm after practicing. i don't feel distracted. i don't feel in a hurry.

day 16: better than coffee

30 minutes - vinyasa flow

better than coffee? i'm not so sure about that, but i will say i felt more awake when i finished than when i started. this was the most active practice i've done in about a week and it felt good.

from yoga journal

in all truthfulness, i couldn't actually manage a couple of the poses. standing split? at 5:45am? nope. camel pose? i didn't even know what this was. apparently, one kneels, then lengthens through the torso, then leans back and grab's one's ankles. not happening. (proper instructions can be found at yoga journal.)

it felt good to get moving  and even though i really, really didn't want to get out of my nice warm bed and wander downstairs to find my mat, i'm glad i did.

day 15: shoulders

30 minutes - shoulder openers

from balanced yoga

to follow on my balance class last night, i chose a class this morning for people with sore shoulders and upper back. it seemed appropriate considering my giant shoulder knot that has been working itself out since the beginning of the week.

i did quite a few standing poses which had me reaching up and pulling down at the same time, again to create space- space in my middle, space between my ears and my shoulders, space between my fingertips and my body. the final pose in the series started with laying on my back with a block under my shoulder blades and a block under my head. then, i reached my arms from my sides over my head with my fingers touching the floor. it was pretty hard to gracefully get out of the pose, but it felt great while i was in it.

and, today is officially the half-way point in the 30 day yoga challenge. i am super impressed with myself that i've managed to make time to practice for 15 days in a row. and with my good friend who is side by side (and on the other side of the world) with me.

we're really doing it.

day 14: balance

60 minutes - balance and alignment

we had our last on-site yoga class at work last night with my favorite instructor. she's so good. we had a small group, but we moved quite a bit. she led us through a series of poses to open the chest and create space between the hips and the shoulders. i felt so much taller after the class.

and she sells wedges to help prop up one's rump when sitting so that it's easier to be tall. it takes less effort to stack my body and decreases the instinct to round the upper back and hunch forward. she jokes that the class should be called all about the pelvis because we spend so much time figuring out how to align our bodies to move with the natural curve of the pelvis and shift from the cultural tendency to push our hips forward, pull our tummies in and muscle our back into sitting up straight.

amazingly, our body is designed to do this on its own and figuring out how to allow that to happen takes concentration and practice.

you can find more about this instructor here. i would recommend her to anyone with any degree of familiarity with yoga. it can feel a little disjointed at the beginning of this type of practice, but the benefits are huge.

day 13: restorative in the morning

20 minutes - restorative

the class i chose this morning had gentle movement to relax. the class was geared toward winding down after a long day, but it felt good to start the day with an inward focus. i forget how we started, but the middle included a good bit of cat/cow and ended with my legs from the knee down supported on the seat of a chair and my back on the ground.

my should is better today, but again i didn't want to aggravate it any more than necessary. tomorrow i'm going to get back into the swing of things with the balance class and then thursday i'm planning to do a more vigorous flow.

i also participated in a mindfulness workshop yesterday and i wanted to replicate the calm from simply noticing my body and noticing my thoughts. it is a relief to not spend time worrying about what's next.

day 12: sore shoulder and hip openers

20 minutes - hip openers, encore performance

i have a giant knot under my shoulder blade on my left side. it is killing me. it's the kind of knot that makes me aware of it every time i move and sends pain radiating into my whole side body. ugh.

i thought to do a nice shoulder practice this morning and my shoulder still hurt so much that i thought i might really hurt myself. i did the hip opener class from yesterday again.

M said that with a knot like this usually it's bad, then really bad and then gets better. i'm hoping that last night to this morning was the really bad and now i'll be on the upswing.

it stinks getting older. oh well.